A Few of My Thoughts and Experience on Milk Sharing

"Welcome to the Milk Mama Diaries Carnival (September). For this month, we will tackle milk sharing and how it can nurture the community, and how this spirit of giving can be sustained. Participants will share their thoughts, experiences, hopes and suggestions on the topic. Please scroll down to the end of the post to see the list of carnival entries."

The only person I've received and given breast milk was my elder sister. When I gave birth to R last June, I didn't have milk until my 4th day. I was grateful that my sister who gave birth last March had some breast milk to spare. I called the NICU and told them not to give anything to R, glucose water or formula milk, but the expressed breast milk I will be providing. When the NICU found out that the breast milk was not from me, they made me write a waiver that I'm giving my baby "donated" milk. I don't know how other hospitals handle "donated" breast milk, but for Manila Doctor's Hospital, that's what they required me. And I gave my excess breast milk in return to my niece when my sister was having milk supply problem.


One of my hopes is to have more milk banks and hospitals to also have a milk bank. Not only in Manila, but also in other parts of our country. That would be great, right? More babies who are in need of breast milk would have access.

When I was having a really low milk supply with Y, I really thought of asking for milk from other moms. My husband was not really comfortable with it so I didn't. Same experience with my younger sister. Our husbands would only accept breast milk if it comes from family. Well, as for me, my only thought was breast milk is still better than giving formula milk. So at the end, I just had to power pump to increase my milk supply. I guess different people really have different views on milk sharing.

As for me, I really admire moms who are selfless and share their milk to families and babies who are in need. I'm also very inspired by the mom who's been donating her breast milk even if her baby have passed on. Currently, I have more than enough frozen breast milk and I'm hoping I can to share them or maybe donate them to a milk bank!

Check out the other participants take on this topic!
Brenda has notes on breast milk givers and takers
Mafeth wrote about being a milk donee
Cris donated her liquid gold
Pat had a happy problem donating solved
Jenny wrote about wet nursing from a relative's experience
Rachel discussed how she felt about receiving donated milk and nursing an adoptee's baby
Mec insists it takes two to Milk Share Tango
Cai received milk from her sister
Nats has a Milk Sharing Story too

One Word of Breastfeeding Advice

"Welcome to the Milk Mama Diaries Carnival (February). For this month, we focus on back to basics. Participants will share advices - either the best breastfeeding advice they received OR/AND the best breastfeeding advice they can give to new moms.  Please scroll down to the end of the post to see the list of carnival entries."


Every new mom is clueless about breastfeeding. I've read books on breastfeeding, attended breastfeeding classes when I was pregnant with Y, but when Y was given to me to breastfeed the very first time, even with all the information I  have, I didn't know what to do! But! I didn't give up. I sought out advices from friends and consulted Abbie Yabot.

From all of those advices, I think the best advice I can give to new breastfeeding moms would be: HAVE TRUST.

Trust your body.New moms often doubt they would have milk when and after they gave birth. Your milk may not have milk right after you give birth, trust your body! Always remember that all moms have milk and most babies don't get hungry the first few days. Trust your body that it will produce milk for your baby!

Trust your milk.When I started breastfeeding Y, my family doubted my breast milk. My husband was my one and only supporter. But that didn't stop me from breastfeeding, I knew that my milk was the best nutrition I could give my child. No water, supplement  I never doubted my milk's capacity to nourish your child.  Don't worry about your baby's weight, breastfed and formula-fed baby's weight are different. Breast milk is the best for your baby!


Have the people around you TRUST you and your milk.
Support is important to any breastfeeding mom. Moms need all the confidence especially the first two weeks of breastfeeding from the dads, grandparents to the siblings, in-laws! Good and positive vibes only!


Breastfeeding takes a lot of work and patience. Having trust helped me a lot during breastfeeding Y. Now that I'm pregnant with my second baby, I can't wait to breastfeed again!

SoLovelyn's My Breastfeeding Blessings
The Articulate Pen's Breastfeeding needs Patience
Diapers and Stethoscope's Back to Basic
My Mommyology's What I've Learned About Breastfeeding
Ms. Masungit's From One Mom To Another
The Odyssey of Dinna's Breastfeeding Words of Wisdom
Mrs. Bry126's We're All in this Together
I Am Clarice's Paying it Forward
My Mommy Kwentos' Sharing My Favorite Breastfeeding Advice
Planet Marsy's Better Than None
Mommy {T} Coach's Saved by the Nursing Mommas
Mama Drama's Patience and Breast-friends
Adventures on Planet Mom's Stubborn Me! Sure Glad I didn't give up
Nanaystrip's Eat Malunggay, Say "I Have Milk" and Love your Baby
Starting at Twenty-Five's My Husband's Best Breastfeeding Advice
Nanay *Loves* Purple's Why Attend Breastfeeding Class/Seminars
Mec as Mom's Enough is Enough
Chronicles of a Nursing Mom's On Breastfeeding Number Two - Redux

My Constant Challenge with Extending Breastfeeding

"Welcome to the Milk Mama Diaries Carnival (November). For this month, participants share their experiences on extended breastfeeding.  This includes tips to moms with young babies, as well as barriers and myths which discourage extended nursing. Please scroll down to the end of this post and check out the other carnival participants."


This month marks our 14th month of breastfeeding. I have no plans on weaning nor Y showing any signs of weaning yet. We want to continue for as long as Y wants to (or when I get pregnant again). It's the perfect setting in our home.

But it's not all perfect outside our home. I've blogged about my breastfeeding woes here and here. It's more frustrating now that Y's bigger. I get reprimanded (at home by my grandma) every time I lift my shirt and feed Y. Saying things like: Stop breastfeeding, she's big already. Give her formula, your milk is not nutritious enough, look at her, she's so tiny! You're not eating healthy, how do you expect Y to get fat if your milk doesn't have enough nutrients? And it goes on and on.... I never got the support I needed from them but that didn't stop me.

Breastfeeding a 14th month-old is a challenge, especially in public. I wasn't successful in teaching Y baby signing milk, so whenever she wants to nurse, it's either she'll pull up my shirt, pull my shirt on the neck or put her hands inside my shirt. Nursing covers are a no-no for her, plus she gets distracted at the sound of anything, phones ringing, birds chirping...  but other than that, breastfeeding is easy breezy.

Breastfeeding greatly helped my relationship and bond with my daughter. I'm a working mom, I'm only with her 12/5 (on weekdays), 24/2 (on weekends). It sucks but this momma gotta work. Before I went back to work (after giving birth), I was already preparing myself on how my relationship with Y would be. I would often hear from other moms that their son/daughter wants and looks for their yaya more than their mothers, that breaks my heart but I had to be prepared of that. But that never happened with me. She's always with her yaya yet Y prefers me more than her, she's a mommy's girl. It amazes me.

I wish it's easy to explain (to my family) why I'm continuing to breastfeed Y, it's a constant argument in the house. I wish giving them handouts about breastfeeding would help or at least convince them a bit. It's funny how my yaya and helper knows a lot on breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is so convenient. It's the fastest booboo fixer. Plus it has tons of benefits. Read here.



We want to continue breastfeeding for as long as Y wants to. No pressure on weaning. I love the bond I have with my daughter because of breastfeeding. There are days when I wish I could stop pumping or stop breastfeeding but I just think about it's health benefits for Y and me and I'm good again.


J and the Three Boys - No more "de-de"
My Mommyology - My Extended Breastfeeding Experience
Mommyluscious - Breastfeeding for Two Beyond Two
Truly Rich Mom - On Extended Breastfeeding (a perfectly normal thing to do)
Life of a Babywearing and Breastfeeding Mommy - Still breastfeeding after 2 years
Got To Believe - Breastfeeding Room Story

Apples and Dumplings - My Constant Challenge with Extending Breastfeeding

Mommy Kuwentos - Challenges and Rewards of Extended Breastfeeding

The Odyssey of Dinna - Nurturing Rafael: Extended Breastfeeding, Stretching Some More Lovin'

Legally Mom - Breastfeeding Beyond 1 Year: Barriers and Issues

Homeschooling Mommy - Yes, I've Got Milk

SOlovelyN - As long as he wants, I can
Touring Kitty - Extended Breastfeeding is Possible
SassyBiatcheMom's World - 1.4 and still breastfeeding

Mec as Mom - Shooting for the Benefits, Extending the Love
Chronicles of a Nursing Mom - Barriers/Myths vs. Extended Breastfeeding

Communication and First Time Breastfeeders

"Welcome to the Milk Mama Diaries Carnival (August). For this month, we join the World Alliance for Breastfeeding Action in it's "Talk to Me!" theme where participants will share personal experiences, insights or recommendations in communicating breastfeeding intentions and goals to their support system. Please scroll down to the end of this post and check out the other carnival participants."

While I was still pregnant, my first dilemma was can I breastfeed and work at the same time. I didn't have a support system at first (of course my husband is my number one supporter!) because we were living independently so I had to do research on everything from the breast pump, storage system, how to properly store breast milk, and the whole shebang. Kellymom, Chronicles of Nursing Mom, and forums were my source of information.

When I got back to work after my maternity leave, there were two things I had to discuss, one with my yaya and the other is with my our HR Department. I already had three yayas, I oriented all of them on their first day how to handle my expressed milk. I printed a guideline from Kellymom and posted in on our ref. It was easy breezy with my yayas.

At work, we don't have a breastfeeding room/station, only an "executive" bathroom which only the bosses are allowed to use, all of other employees use the common bathroom outside of our office. On my first day back, I talked to our HR manager that I'll be expressing milk for my baby and asked which room I can use to have my pumping sessions and that I needed an outlet because I'm using an electric pump. She told me I can use the executive bathroom, so that's where I pump until to this day. I actually had a problem the second day, one HR personnel locked that bathroom! I think she did that on purpose because well, I'm not a boss and she saw me using it. Tinarayan pa ako! I had to explain to her that I was breastfeeding and I'm pumping milk for my baby. She said she wasn't advised about me using the bathroom and I should ask permission from the HR manager. I told her that the HR already know. Grrr! That shut her mouth! It was smooth sailing after that.

 

With my family, I'm the first one to breastfeed, so I really need to explain why I'm doing it, why I'm exclusively breastfeeding, why is it important to breastfeed for the first six months and no supplementing of formula milk and water. I've got into arguments and debates with my mom and grandma on why I don't want Y to wean and just drink formula. She has the occasional formula milk when my supply is really really low and can't keep up with her demands. My husband is a breastfed baby, he was breastfed until he was four and he rarely gets sick!

In my case or in any case, communication is one of the keys to breastfeed successfully, at home or in the office. With my family, they don't know anything about breastfeeding, so I have to be the one to have all the knowledge and information. I have to be armed with answers to all their questions. I also made sure to tell my family that I intend to breastfeed for as long as I can. Even if my mom and my grandma had told me to wean now or wean when she reaches 1.5 years old, I made my stand. One thing I learned from my sister's failed breastfeeding experience is that she didn't really communicate her breastfeeding intentions to her husband and her MIL. She's living in the province and me being her only support system, I really can't do much but give advice and suggestions. In the end, she was not successful.

Communication, having an open minded support system, and having a supportive support system are important in breastfeeding successfully. I'm no expert on this so advice and insights from other breastfeeding moms would be welcome. :)


Happy Breastfeeding Month!

Check out other participant's entries:
DaintyMom's Creating a Pro-Breastfeeding Culture in the Family (Facebook and Twitter: @Dainty_Mom)
Wifely Steps' On Breastfeeding: Say It, Claim It, Get Support! (Facebook and Twitter: @macaronigirl)
Truly Rich Mom's How To Get Others to Support You in Breastfeeding (Facebook and Twitter: @tinasrodriguez)
EthanMama's My Best Breastfeeding Support System - My Husband (Twitter: @ethanmama)
Raising Baby Lia's A Shoutout to my Breastfeeding Buddies
Jen CC Tan's I'm Breastfeeding, and That's That! (Facebook and Twitter: @next9baby)
Project Blog by Kate's Talk and Make it Happen (Facebook and Twitter: @kate_demetrio)
My Mommy Kwentos' How I Recruited my Top Breastfeeding Buddies (Facebook)
Apples  & Dumplings Communicating and First Time Breastfeeders (Twitter: @apple_dumplings)
I'm a Newbie Wife's How I Taught My Family to Breastfeed
TouringKitty's Communication Through Breastfeeding (Twitter: @Touringkitty)
Mec as Mom's Pre-Natal Pediatric Consultations Are Necessary
Escie's World's Ready, Get Set, Go! for Breastfeeding (Twitter: @Escielicious)
Nanaystrip's BreasTALK : Text, Retweet, Share your Knowledge and Experiences (Twitter: @bunsonimaestro)
Superwomom's A-S-Ks (on breastfeeding questions, help, support)
Go Help Yourself's “6 persuasion tips for breastfeeding moms and advocates”
Legally Mom's Breastfeeding Talk Between Me and My Formula Fed Daughter (Facebook and Twitter: @legallymomPH
Handy Mommy's Couple's Communication and Decision: Key to Successful Breastfeeding
Chronicles of a Nursing Mom's Effective Communication Bucket List (Facebook and Twitter: @mamababylove)